Increasing Your Child’s Self-Esteem


“Kind words are short and easy to speak but their echoes are truly endless” - Mother Theresa

One of the most valuable things you can do as a parent is to build your child’s self-esteem.  Self-esteem is the collection of beliefs or feelings we have about ourselves.  How we define or think of ourselves influences our motivations, attitudes, and behaviors and affects our emotional adjustment.

Healthy self-esteem is a child’s armor against the peer pressure and challenges of society.

Kids who feel good about themselves seem to have an easier time handling conflicts, persevering and resisting negative pressures. They tend to smile more readily and enjoy life – isn’t that what you would like for your child?

Patterns of self-esteem start very early in life – beginning when your child is a toddler and develops even more as they get older.  You play a major role in this development – as with most things, it all begins in the home.

There are sure-fire ways to increase your child’s self-esteem and when you take the time to focus on the positive things you see in your child, the negative or troubling things begin to fade away.

Simple ways you can build your child’s self-esteem include:

  • Appreciating your child
  • Tell your child that you love them
  • Spend time with your child
  • Encouraging your child to make choices – this leads to confidence and independence
  • Really listen to your child’s opinion
  • Take the time to explain reasons, when it is appropriate
  • Feed your child daily with positive encouragement – not general  praise, but specific encouragement
  • Encourage your child to try new and challenging activities – this builds perseverance

Recently I was introduced to a wonderful tool that makes it much easier for parents to recognize and record the positive things about those they love.  The “I like book” for kids as well as the “I like book” for couples are perfect for busy families who do not want to miss the opportunity to capture the positive!


The books are easy to use – broken down by 12 months (you can start anytime) and have an entry available for each parent per day.  I love that you can write a short line or phrase for each day and have it as a record to look back on.  Wouldn’t it be fun to look back at these 10 years from now?  I know it will become a treasure that your child will hold close to their heart!

I am thrilled to share that I was given two of the books to giveaway – one for children and one for spouses.  Please leave a comment to enter – share with me one thing you can appreciate about your child today – I can’t wait to read them!  Entries close midnight May 17th and will be announced.

You can find out more about the books at .  They are offering a discount of 40% when you use the code kids2010 when you register at checkout.  Get one at a discount and start investing in your child today!


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  1. I love this idea so much, that even if I don’t win it, we will be starting an I like book for our kids! Thanks so much!!!!!! Really…… this is just the idea I needed!
    I appreciate that my children love me for who I am. They tell me I am beautiful, even though I don’t always feel it, they tell me they love me, they hug me and they love to play with my hair which shows me an abundance of love!
    I am truly blessed!
    Lindsey would love for you to read….40 weeks old

  2. Melanie Loperano says:

    My 6-years old (soon to be 7-years old) son is still excited to see me everyday when he gets off the school bus. He runs and says, “Momma!” or “Mommy!” You would think it’s been longer than just a few hours at school since he has seen me. It makes me feel so good.

  3. I appreciate my sons (ages 3, 7, and 8) for loving me unconditionally inspite of myself. I haven’t given them the best start, but pray it isn’t too late to undo any damage and give them a better future.

  4. Well I have 3 children but what I appreciate about my children today is the fact that they are always forgiving and have a never ending love for just about everyone. No matter how many times I get upset at them they are always forgiving of my misplaced anger and always loving everyone they meet.
    Katrina would love for you to read….Educational Insights Giveaway!

  5. I appreciate the fact that all five of my kids like to curl up on the couch and read a book (or five!) with me. I love that time together, and love that they enjoy reading so much.

  6. I appreciate that my daughter has such an outgoing personality, she is so willing to go up to other kids and ask them to play. It’s something that I particularly appreciate because I was always a shy child and, although her personality in this area is so different than mine, I love to see how well it serves her.
    JoannaTopazT would love for you to read….Books of 2011- 16-20

  7. I love the way that both of my girls, at ages 8 and almost 13, aren’t afraid to be themselves. I wish I had known that freedom at their ages, and I privately celebrate when I see either of them demonstrate their uniqueness. Their Creator made them both “beautifully and wonderfully” and I’m glad that they understand that Truth.

  8. Lisa Buchanan says:

    I have two children – a boy, age 8 and a girl, age 4. I appreciate their unique personalities and the love that they have for me and others. They are both such great children with huge hearts and unique differences. They have a special bond with us and each other.

  9. What a great post, Susan! And a great reminder. This book looks fantastic! On my list of “to gets”! What I love about my 6 year-old is that he is his own little man, even at his age. He knows what he believes and doesn’t succumb to the other kids. He also shows great leadership qualities. I couldn’t be more proud of him. My 3 year-old is at quite the challenging age :) but I so adore his humor and his ability to stand up for himself to his older brother. He is quite the comic relief in our home. He has a soft tender side, too, that melts my heart. My 10 month- old is just precious, precious, precious! She has such a sweet spirit about her. She has something about her that feels like she is looking into my soul when she stares at me! Maybe she’s just poopy- I don’t know! Lol Thank you for giving us all this opportunity to think about the good in our children and the permission to brag for a moment! Have a great day!

  10. Love all these – I will be drawing here soon and emailing the winner!!!

  11. patricia delgado says:

    I appreciate my 3 year old son’s tender heart and sense of fairness. Anytime i shout, “ow” from anywhere, he quickly stops what he is doing, looks my way and say, “are you ok, mommy?”. We were presenting some folks to be baptized and invited others who hadn’t signed up but wanted to be baptized and we pulled out a bin with supplies for men or women etc. so that there would be no excuse to not to, well my son went over to the supplies and just started passing them out, making sure everyone had one of what was in the box. LOL, of course mid way we had to pull him aside and thank him for his sweetness. Those things make me smile:)

  12. That all tells you that you are doing all the right things in your home! Keep it up :-)

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