As I reflect on the past Eleven weeks of reading, pondering, discussions and prayer, I am feeling like I learned a lot about myself, yet once again! I hope you feel the same.
This struck me as I began reading this last chapter:
“Sue, we did the best we could.”
Isn’t that all that matters? Truly, we all want to do our best, and given different seasons of our life or different experiences – we all start at a different point and can only do the best we can do with what we know. What our parents knew or were told about raising kids is completely different for the most part than what our generation is being told…..but that was what they knew.
Here is my transparency and authenticity – some of you may know this about me, but some may not. I made the choice many years ago to leave my marriage and get divorced. I felt at the time it was my only choice and I have taken responsibility for this choice. I was not a believer in Christ, did not understand the full commitment of marriage and have held guilt in my heart for years because I made the choice for my kids to live in a divorced home.
I could live in this guilt and heaviness, or move forward in the best way possible. I chose that. Shortly after becoming a single mom, I did give my life to Christ and was blessed to learn how to live my life according to His guidelines. I made choices that were not the best, but at the time they seemed the best. I did the best I could.
“Learning to be a Life-Giving Mom without regrets requires embracing the season you are in. You have to let go of the past and live in the present as you lay hold of the future. At each transition you will likely shed some tears as you realize that you can’t go back and re-live the past. You must move forward, facing the imperfections of your present, hoping for the future.”
Oh how I wish someone could have whispered these words into my ears 15 years ago! I have grown to understand and embrace this type of thinking, but I wish I would have been given the grace – to myself much earlier in life. I can’t go back, and completely realize that, I can only move forward. God is using my mistakes, my failures to help others – I see it now, but would never have thought that years ago.
It is true, what Sue says, that all go through trials in our life and it is ONLY through those trials that our character is being perfected. I would not be who I am NOW, if it had not been for the trials of before.
There are days I struggle to let go of the past and not dwell on choices I’ve made – but regret will get me nowhere but down. I honestly think this had something to do with my depression for years – that I constantly could not give myself a break – there was no grace left for me. Simple, but profound.
I pray that this study revealed areas of your life where you can rejoice over as well as ask for His guidance every single day. I think for me – I loved the prayers that I could use specifically asking for help – each and every day. This is where the power is – receiving HIS power in my day.
Because you see…..I can’t do this all myself. And when I begin to get cocky and think I can – I stumble and fall. It is my wake-up call to reach out to Him. To surrender and allow Him to guide me and fill me.
“Living in the present is being content with who you are.”